Rules Review | Analysts’ Strategies

The Clearinghouse

The Clearinghouse remains surprised by the influence of the Analysts on the outcome of the league.

In the beginning, Big Tuna, aka “PC,” showed the accountants how a “pick three” could be more complicated than simply picking three winners. The PC-Fecta Derby carries his name, but the Player Haters Preakness also comes from his pick strategy in the first race of the first year before the four “Crown” races existed in their current form.

We tried to make the individual Crown races the featured races of the year, but retired-Analyst, Minds Blank, elevated the stature of the Analyst of the Year Award with her superlative trash talking. The trophy races only become more prestigious after Little Tuna — who had the worst regular season of any Analyst in Season I — rode the hated New Englanders to the pinnacle of sports analysis, The Super Trifecta Bowl.

The following season, Little Tuna then showed the rest of the Analysts what it takes to ride a front-running Home Team over the course of the regular season to secure the Analyst of the Year. Her romp last year, we at The Clearinghouse freely admit amongst ourselves, worried us. Although the annual competition came down to the wire with The Strategist and her unpredictable Fishe-rams that only she could predict, after the season concluded, we wondered if the Analysts might game the Rules by riding front-runners out of the gates?

Then along comes B-Reezy to shift the strategy again this year. He has the absolute worst team in our league (if not all of professional football) and, yet, he will likely secure the Analyst of the Year Award by the 15th week of the season, if not next week. Taking a long-stride with little regard for the Crown races, B-Reezy explained in Week 5:

My strategy is different from last year where I made a lot of my picks with my home team. I’m still a number 1 Bears fan but “Straight out, my strategy is, when I feel pretty sure I go for the trifecta. I’m going for the big one, Analysts of the Year Award. I HAVE MY EYE ON THE PRIZE!!! ”

Next year, Analysts will have at least four different and proven strategies available to start the season: Big Tuna’s Crown team sprints, The Strategist’s perennial and inscrutable 8-8 team, Little Tuna’s front-runner team, and now B-Reezy’s steady trot to the finish line in the saddle of an un-bear-able team.

Anyway, this silly little competition remains far more interesting than we anticipated when negotiating terms of service with The Bookie three years ago. Just sayin’….

So, now, The Clearinghouse has another challenge for the Analysts… [more to come]

The Bookie

“If picking three correct teams is too easy we will just figure out a way to make it harder.”

Famous words from 3 years ago. Just sayin’…

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